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ForumsPsychological & BehavioralMy relationship with food has completely changed and I am grieving it

My relationship with food has completely changed and I am grieving it

roxy_nash Thu, Apr 23, 2026 at 10:03 PM 9 replies 648 viewsPage 1 of 2
roxy_nash
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178
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Dec 2024
Nashville, TN
Apr 23, 2026 at 10:03 PM#1
I looked in the mirror yesterday and didn't recognize myself. Not in the dramatic weight-loss-reveal way. In the unsettling, existential way. I've lost 90 lbs over 10 months and I genuinely don't know whose body this is. I touch my collarbone and it feels like touching a stranger. My hip bones exist apparently? My hands look different. I keep catching my reflection in windows and doing a double-take because my brain hasn't updated its internal image of me. Does anyone else feel like they're living in someone else's body?
21 16josh_phd_bmore, roxy_nash, tony_orlando and 18 others
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NauseaFreeNow
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345
1,234
Aug 2024
Indiana
Apr 23, 2026 at 10:19 PM#2
Look up "phantom fat." It's a documented psychological phenomenon where people who've lost significant weight still perceive themselves as their previous size. I still try to squeeze through gaps that I could easily walk through. I still reach for the seatbelt extender on planes. My body changed but my brain is running outdated software.
Last edited: Apr 24, 2026 at 2:19 AM
20 15maya_sedona, stefan_berlin, Dr.EM_Chicago and 17 others
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gary_naperville
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Oct 2024
Naperville, IL
Apr 23, 2026 at 10:35 PM#3
I avoid mirrors because seeing my new reflection feels like a jump scare. I know that sounds insane. But there's a very specific kind of distress that comes from not recognizing the body you're living in. It's disorienting on a fundamental level. Like you got transplanted into someone else's life.
19 14TomTeleRx, DoseLogDan, SleepFixSam and 16 others
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josh_phd_bmore
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Jul 2024
Baltimore, MD
Apr 23, 2026 at 10:51 PM#4
The jump scare thing — exactly. Catching my reflection in a store window literally startles me. My brain still expects to see a 280-lb person and instead there's this stranger looking back.
18 13KarenAZ_mom, zoe_NC, Dr.ObesityLA and 15 others
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anna.melb_AU
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Apr 2024
Melbourne, AU
Apr 24, 2026 at 12:14 AM#5
What nobody tells you is that body image doesn't automatically improve with weight loss. I thought if I could just get thin, I'd finally feel good in my body. Instead I went from hating a big body to feeling alien in a smaller one. The dysphoria is different but it's still dysphoria. I had to start therapy specifically for this.
17 12Dr.LipidDallas, alex_tucson, kevin_tulsa and 14 others
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